Wednesday, March 23, 2011

In God's Country

Bono rings out the words early:

Rivers run, but soon run dry, we need new dreams tonight.

I suppose it doesn't really matter who you are, or what you do, the river will eventually run dry....just ask Charlie Sheen.  I gotta love Charlie, but he's a total basket case.  Why do we love watching the freaks?  I might not know why, but I do.  I would, however, report to all you duffers out there that I would have said I had the blood of a Chupacabra, rather than a lame old tiger.  Charlie needs a new dream...and...I do too.

My wife completes her third year of medical school in a month or so.  Soon, probably sooner than I'll be ready, she'll be applying and hopefully gaining a residency.  To those of us that won't be doctors any time soon, that means that she'll become an income producer, which would be the next step to having Adonis DNA, on her way to making millions per hour (or so I like to keep the dream going in my head).  

Regardless of what she winds up doing, or where she winds up doing it...she'll be a fantastic doctor, you should come see her sometime...I will have an opportunity to chase a dream.  Whatever I want to do, I'll have the opportunity to branch out, and seek a new adventure.  I won't be able slack...much, if you've ever met my wife, but I will be able to chase different opportunities that were previously not within my grasp.

What will that be?

I've no friggin clue.  I started this journey believing that I had 5-6 years to decide what I wanted to do.  Time's a-wasting Speedy.

I have found myself in a situation, where I have to begin to define, and act, upon my dreams.  

I need new dreams.

A friend asked me a very eye-opening question earlier today,  "Are you having a hard time with this, because maybe you haven't ever gotten to choose?"

My life has been filled with adventure, mistakes, successes and tragedy.  I wouldn't trade any of it, but there's truth to what he's pointing at.  I've never chosen.  I've always lived my life seeking opportunities, and took them, when they opened up.  Not discriminately, mind you.  I graduated from college, yes, but that was a mission in itself.  I've had jobs after college, but that was because I had to work.  I've never started with an idea, researched it, and made good on acting it out in real life.  

Perhaps, I've lived my life passively, under the guise of being quick on my feet. 

Perhaps, it's time I got off my ass and figured out what I want to do with my life.  

I don't think you can do it for me...and I'm passed the point of believing that God will deliver a package, or a fortune cookie with a job title treasured within it.  I do believe that I have God's support...that is, as long as I don't start my own porn company, or something stupid like that.  I have permission.  I have a commission.  I have opportunity.  

When all you've done with your life centers around surviving, what do you do when the danger is gone?  No fight or flight...just an open road, full tank of gas, and a good set of tunes to serenade you...which road do you take?

I've got some boundaries, and a family to take care of, but other than that, I can do pretty much whatever I choose.  

How does the choice get chosen?

I could keep re-describing my situation for hours...I'd better get to doing some research.  

No 3-wood here, no iron off the tee...gotta take out the big stick and let her rip.  Head down, watch the ball, knees bent, follow through...