I like flawed people. I like flawed people that actually like to admit their flaws. I like to quietly, and with brevity, confess my uneasy points of self awareness, where I might not be completely on target. That would be my wonderful wife's version...I simply tell people the shit I did wrong, and work hard at sounding sincere, when I honestly tell them I'll try not to do it again. I will say this about my wife, she's pretty damn near perfect. She's one of those people who would be a good Baptist, in some ways...she may have sinned once...when she was 12, but she probably didn't mean to...so the angels are still probably discussing it with Jesus.
Me, I'm pretty screwed up, and honestly, I'm getting more comfortable with it the older I get. I take 6-7 medications today for all sorts of things from depression, high cholesterol, allergies, thyroid supplements...
I always get off topic...damn.
So, when people tell me their flaws...well tell isn't the right word....when people admit they've fucked up, here's what really happens:
- I see that you are a self aware person...this is good. I like people that I don't have to write things down for.
- You are flawed...which is also good. Means I don't have to have an awkward conversation later over too many beers, where I tell you that you are not, indeed, Jesus, and that you are a fuck up like the rest of us. (this has only happened a couple of times, and interestingly enough, I'm not bad at it).
- You understand and respect others...this is damn good. This means we can be friends.
- You are secure enough to tell me you aren't perfect....which is also good. I already knew it, and I don't need to lug your sorry insecure ass around...there are too many people like that out there anyway.
See, admitting you were wrong, did something wrong, screwed someone over, or just didn't get it right this time, can be very positive for your friends, family and those around you.
and...if you can't tell someone that you were wrong...and you might not like this...but, it does sort of knock out the first three.