Monday, February 15, 2010


I read a sermon today that talked about how God likes flawed people.  I like that, because I'm a very flawed person.  I like God, too, because it means that it isn't all up to me, all the time.  

I like flawed people.  I like flawed people that actually like to admit their flaws.  I like to quietly, and with brevity, confess my uneasy points of self awareness, where I might not be completely on target.  That would be my wonderful wife's version...I simply tell people the shit I did wrong, and work hard at sounding sincere, when I honestly tell them I'll try not to do it again.  I will say this about my wife, she's pretty damn near perfect.  She's one of those people who would be a good Baptist, in some ways...she may have sinned once...when she was 12, but she probably didn't mean the angels are still probably discussing it with Jesus.  

Me, I'm pretty screwed up, and honestly, I'm getting more comfortable with it the older I get.  I take 6-7 medications today for all sorts of things from depression, high cholesterol, allergies, thyroid supplements...

I always get off topic...damn.

So, when people tell me their flaws...well tell isn't the right word....when people admit they've fucked up, here's what really happens:

  • I see that you are a self aware person...this is good.  I like people that I don't have to write things down for.
  • You are flawed...which is also good.  Means I don't have to have an awkward conversation later over too many beers, where I tell you that you are not, indeed, Jesus, and that you are a fuck up like the rest of us.  (this has only happened a couple of times, and interestingly enough, I'm not bad at it).
  • You understand and respect others...this is damn good.  This means we can be friends.
  • You are secure enough to tell me you aren't perfect....which is also good.  I already knew it, and I don't need to lug your sorry insecure ass around...there are too many people like that out there anyway.

See, admitting you were wrong, did something wrong, screwed someone over, or just didn't get it right this time, can be very positive for your friends, family and those around you.  

and...if you can't tell someone that you were wrong...and you might not like this...but, it does sort of knock out the first three. 


Monday, February 8, 2010

Need to Blog...Need to Write

I want to write.  It is one of the most fascinating and terrifying desires I've ever had.  At the moment though, I'm having some very traumatic stress over the fact that this fucking laptop has the most sensitive touch pad in the world.

I digress.  Many of us think about writing, and fewer than many of us actually aspire to write, less than fewer of many of actually do it, and only a few actually get through it successfully and get published.  However, what I find particularly interesting, is that most people who have blogs, think they can write...which happens to be quite a bit of us...weird.

I'd like to introduce an addendum to an old adage:  Opinions AND BLOGS, are like assholes, everybody's got one.

I aspire to be the few of us.  Problem:  to those that do, and do well, you understand...becomes increasingly difficult with every word you write.  It starts out innocently, You have a head full of witty sayings, snippets of memories and such, and suddenly you picture yourself as the next David Sedaris, only a mostly heterosexual David Sedaris...I say that because most of the gay folk I'm acquainted with...actually know whether they can write or not already...perhaps it comes with the serious self-awareness that homosexuality brings (unfortunately).

Again, I digress

Writing becomes very hard work.  Personally, and since this is my blog (I've still not explained why I have one if I hate them, eh)...I can be personal.  Personally, I struggle seriously with creating passive, weak, anexoric, and sometimes grammatically incorrect sentences.  Which has sent me into a mission in life to create strong, powerful, creatively eccentric, descriptive and ...sort of lost my train there, damn....sentences.

I know that I have a chance.  I've heard that the first step (or level 1), of writing begins with business writing, mostly email.  I have noticed that I have achieved the kick-ass level 12 of business writing.  I know this because my colleagues, and my marketing folks...send me stuff to read and re-write, for power.  Which presents my first point of revelation that I don't suck.

And...on to my main point, the main writing exercise is...writing.  Now my secret is revealed...and why I must have a blog, and a write.